sleep

Day Two Twelve

~ silsurf ~ Leave a comment

I know I have spoken before about the fact that a human’s brain is not fully developed until age seven and before that time the left and right halves of the brain are separated (the corpus callosum is not fully developed) and because of this, very fundamental understanding of right and wrong, good and bad are not altogether there.

I am afraid to admit that I get most of this kind  of info from my trusted, well read, RIE teacher. She says for a fuller understanding of this concept you should read:

Parenting From The Inside Out

and

The Developing Person Through The Life Span

We have lived and believed this for a long time, but it was not until the other day did Luke show us in his own words how true it is and why I am so happy we do not have any excessive media in our household and the school he is starting next year has a no media policy, here is what happened.

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While on vacation Luke watched Fantastic Mr Fox. He watched a little bit before supper and was then telling us how his eyes were glued to it and he could not take his eyeballs away from the screen. We allowed him to finish watching it after supper.

Then the next night he last told us before bedtime about how he was a bit scared to go to sleep because the version of Mr Fox in his dreams was scarier than the version he saw on the TV. That he was ok watching the version of TV, but watching the version in his dreams was upsetting to him too much.

It was a relatively safe, good wake up call for Mom and Dad, and secretly I have been wanting to watch Mr Fox for a long time, no bad dreams for me though!

 

Day One Ninety

~ silsurf ~ 3 Comments

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Beau

Lily has been calling Luke “beau” for quite a few months. At first we figured it was a minimalist version of brother, but at this point I think it is just her name for Luke. I have wondered whether it will stick or not. I mean I like the name and think it fits and for sure Lily has no sign of letting up on calling him Beau.

This is part of the inner conversation that mommy and me have been having about the completely age appropriate worship of the old sibling.

Lily lives and breathes “Beau”, she references him all day long when he is at school, she points to his car seat, she sleeps in his bed, Yesterday when she woke from her nap, her first word was “Beau?”

2015Mayuntitled-16When they are together she will do anything to be with him, sit next to him, have whatever he has, do whatever he does. She eats when he eats, the list goes on and on.

The other day in RIE class a parent added to this common scenario, “And then it will stop in a breath”, Lily will get to a place where “Beau” is not the pinnacle of everything that she knows. Its just the way it goes.

Right now much of my day when the kids are together, especially at home where there “things” are in play, The constant battle between Lily wanted everything Beau and Luke kinda not really wanting any of it if it gets in the way of his free play or if it takes away from Daddy time. This is a hard and ongoing situation and though I love and cherish Lily’s current state of Beau-ness, there is a part of me that can’t wait for it to be over. But, then of course there will be another intensely complicated and challenging developmental issue to deal with, because that is what parenting is all about. Love, support, interest, understanding and presence, presence, presence.