Luke

Post 358: Switch Witch

~ silsurf ~ Leave a comment

Halloween got a bit more fun and/or confusing this year. Of course there was the joy/stress of making the costumes. Luke’s was simple as all I had to do was modify an existing robe to help him create “fire goblin”, but Lily offered up a more challenging situation. Initially Luke had convinced Lily to be a sword swallower (??), But, Mom got her off on a better avenue while perusing this wonderful book we found at the library defining every flower fairy you can point your finger at.

Turns out the book and the fairies are all well known, though I had never come across this. Always such a delight to find new found treasures from old school childhood fantasy. (old ways are the best) There is even a dedicated website to the Flower Fairies (of course there is).

As per our routine we did a very short, once around the block trick or treat run, which amounts to a very small amount of candy in the grand scheme of things, yet this is where the fun sort of ends. I will gladly say that both our kids are really great about just having a piece or two a day, (we still have candy left over from last Halloween) there is very little pushing back, but in the days that follow there is a bit of scheming, hiding, counting and re-counting of the “loot”.

a hidden box of dots

Then came the “Switch Witch”

A quick tour of the old interwebs reveals Switch Witch is probably just a marketing ploy, nonetheless there is merit in its concept. The Switch Witch is new to our home. Every question I asked Luke about how the Switch Witch worked, resulted in: “I will have to ask Dashiell tomorrow at school, he knows everything about the Switch Witch”. So, with Dashiell’s help, our version resulted in:

Give up 50% of your Halloween Candy in exchange for a toy of your choice.

The second part was a bit broad, but we were still willing to go with it for one simple reason:

Candy=Madness

As I said our kids do not eat much candy, yet just having that old pumpkin head sitting around the house certainly stirs up a certain level of craziness that I for one do not enjoy.

Switch With, your on!

A quick trip to Target where I found TWO legos sets on-sale (a rare event in and of itself and mission accomplished.

Thank you Switch Witch, see you next year.

Post 357: Equilibrium and Dis-equilibrium

~ silsurf ~ Leave a comment

I keep coming back to this page, not having a clear concise parenting moment to capture. Perhaps that is indicative of the way things are around here these days.
I think being a seven year old Luke is very intense. There has been an out pouring of feelings and the ferocity he undertakes most all endeavors is impressive.

I have to remind myself of this odd, yet totally true battle of equilibrium against disequilibrium.

The Gessell Institue has studied child development for literally 100 years. One of the many cycles they observed are the Childs developmental stages alternating in and out of whack. Called the stages of equilibrium and dis-equilibrium.

Well, I think it is safe to say the Luke is in a stage of dis-equilibrium, and it is really helpful to know that.

self portrait

Its not about being negative or brooding, more about being frustrated and filled with energy that is not yet found a path. One of the symptoms (not the right word) of dis-equilibrium is that it comes right before an outpouring of pure development, that there is all this growth energy that has not yet been directed.

What I have been seeing in Luke is an intensity and a short attention span.

As a parent it can be quite confusing. Because it feels like one moment everything is in sync and relatively calm and focused and the next it is chaotic and sharp and kind of icky. Boy can it get icky.

We all love the calm, nurturing moments and it makes for such a better easier day, but life is not that simple, so it is important to remind myself that this too shall pass. That is why I am here, to be available and thoughtful and understanding of my families needs.

Under many circumstances I would rely on caloric intake to help fix this imbalance, my experience has been that 90% of the dis-equilibrium in my family (including myself) comes from lack of proper food intake. But in Luke’s case, right now, it is not always that simple. He is just bursting with life force.


I tend not to whip out my camera at the times of dis-equilibrium, so I will not even venture to display that.

I am also sporadically reading a series of lectures by Rudolf Steiner entitled The Kingdom of Childhood. Steiner is the brain behind Waldorf Education. It can be a bit awkward because of the somewhat odd dated writing style, but the message sings to me.

“The child is curious, but not with an intellectual curiosity for as yet it has no reasoning powers; and anyone who appeals to the intellect of a child of seven is quite on the wrong lines; but it has fantasy and this it is with which we must deal. It is really a question of developing the concept of a kind of “milk of the soul” For you see, after birth the child must be given bodily milk. This constitutes its food and every other necessary substance is contained in the milk that the child consumes. And when he comes to school at the age of the changing of the teeth it is again milk that you must give him, but now, milk for the soul. That is to say, your teaching must not be made up of isolated units, but all That the child receives must be a unity; when he has gone through the change of teeth he must have “soul milk.” If he is taught to read and write as two separate things it is just as though his milk were to be separated chemically into two different parts, and you gave him one part at one time and the other at another. Reading and writing must form a unity. You must bring this idea of “soul milk” into being for your work with the children when they first come to school.”

This really helps me acknowledge again that this is their world, not mine, I am just trying to make it the best possible transit from birth to adulthood. With a splash of “soul milk”.

Post 356: Regicaster

~ silsurf ~ Leave a comment

Just a morning impromptu crystal and geode museum set up in the dining room.

Nothing was for sale, but you can look (without touching) and ask any questions you want to the two staff members.

Announcements were made with Lily’s cash register, which she calls a

Regi-caster, which is not only a better name, but even harder to say IMHO.

Post 355: Just In Case…

~ silsurf ~ 1 Comment

So, a few days after coming home from our summer vacation I noticed Luke had “borrowed” one of these from the plane:

Then I said to myself, “should I go and see if I can find the large envelope filled with airline safety brochures that I collected as a child for MANY years?

Yes, I should, so I did and here they are:

Of course Luke thought nothing of the fact that I had a large collection of them, but what do you think? Is this a co-incidence?

Post 352: Summer of Love

~ silsurf ~ Leave a comment

It was a big summer, it was also a short summer. We knew it would be filled with LOTS of personal growth for both Luke and Lily and it proved to be so true.

Our highlight was a two week visit to the State of Maine. Spent between Grandma’s lake house and a trip to Baxter State Park. I could go on and on with observations, the hours Luke spent looking for frogs, the solo kayaking missions, but one particular adventure speaks to me regarding Luke’s perseverance.

During our stay in Maine we had planned at trip to the top of Mt Katahdin, the tallest peak in the state, in Baxter State Park. The trip included a small group of family and there had been lots of thinking about the “what if’s”, such as what if Luke needs to turn back, where will we meet, etc. There is no cell reception in Baxter State Park, where Katahdin resides. It is a very rigorous climb, especially above the timber line. It was always part of the plan that Lily and I would not even attempt the ascent, spending our day on a pristine lake with no one but frogs. So it was important that we had a plan on where and how to meet.

I guess all that needs to be said is that Luke not only climbed the mountain, but was pretty much in front the entire time. When the adults returned to civilization uniformly “plastered” and could barely walk, Luke, when asked if his legs were sore, merely said, “Not really”.

This was one of the first times that I have had the experience of Luke dramatically surpassing my expectations. Which filled me with awe, love and of course admiration. I now think this may be a feeling I will have to get used to more and more as Luke’s confidence and resourcefulness blossom.

Like all the endless clichés of parenthood: “your life will change when you have kids”, “you can never love anything as much as your own child”, letting go is going to be a brutal one.

Because it was Maine, and because it was Katahdin, and because we were with family, the true story of a twelve year old boy that was lost on that exact same mountain in 1939 came up. Grandma loaned us a signed copy of the book “Lost on a mountain in Maine” by Donn Fendler. At first Luke had no interest, I think the cover was a bit off putting to be honest, but when we got home we started reading it all together in the evenings, a few chapters a day and he really go into it.

It is wonderfully simple book, told through the eyes of a twelve year old boy who so simply moves forward day after day after day with virtually no survival skills. Unbeknownst to him, hundreds of people searching for him day and night, and ultimately assuming he had perished. So when you finally get to the place ten days later where he sees another human being, half naked, covered with sores and bug bites, his feet in tatters (he had lost his shoes on day one) and having lost 13 pounds, it is impossible to not be deeply moved.

Interestingly enough, Donn Fendler recently passed away and there is a proof of concept for a movie version of the book. Sometimes the timing of things in life are so wild!

Our summer vacation was topped off by a cancelled flight that lead to a free first class upgrade. On both legs of the journey, Luke got the prime treatment from the airline folks.

Bangor International is the smallest big airport in the world!

On the JFK – LA we were in sleeper seats (first time for both of us) after watching a high end, super fancy-cool DJ guy wait in line at Priority boarding for over an hour, even I was taken aback when the gate check person came straight up to Luke and said “How would YOU! (yes pointing) like to be the first person on the place and meet the crew?

Well, here it is:

I dont remember two, three, four very much. But, I REMEMBER seven!

It was a truly wonderful summer vacation.